You’re constantly complaining

One of the most obvious signs of a chronic complainer is that you’re … well, complaining all the time!

However, it isn’t always that obvious to us because we might get stuck into a pattern of constant whining without even being aware that we’re exhibiting that behavior.

Still, we should always take some time to analyze and reflect on our actions in order to improve.

People are pointing out that you nitpick a lot

There might be some truth to the matter when people tell you that you’re nitpicking all the time.

Nevertheless, we shouldn’t take everything we hear and see at face value. Thus, we should take some time to determine if the folks saying those things truly want the best for us. In the past, I had some trying to gaslight me in an attempt to control me because it suited their personal goals.

If they don’t think in your best welfare, then they might simply be gaslighting you, or trying to bring you down along with them, even if only not to be miserable alone. Just because you might be kind and respectful doesn’t mean that everyone thinks and acts in the same manner.

You’re venting without finding, or even trying to find solutions

Venting has its time and place. But voicing your discontent perpetually without even attempting to find answers is simply counterproductive, and will aid no one. Not even yourself.

We should always try to think of solutions, not problems. Yet, it isn’t uncommon for people to moan just simply because they can, and since it garners them the attention they so desire.

You ruminate a lot

Ruminating a lot might cause overthinking behavior, and even seeing all the negative events in life more clearly since that’s what we focus on. 

That’s not always a bad thing, and can even be advantageous since understanding the issue can lead to resolutions.

Still, constantly being faced with all the antagonistic experiences and despicable things others do might make you more depressed, bitter, and even cruel.

Needless to say, bitter individuals are more likely to grumble a lot because they’re stuck in a negative mindset compared to their more optimistic peers.

People avoid you

People avoiding you can have multiple reasons. You might simply have different personalities and interests, but it’s also possible that they’re intentionally avoiding you because you’re always whining about the smallest, most insignificant things in the world.

We typically dislike negativity in our existence because there’s already enough trouble and tragic events going on as is. We don’t need any additional hassles that we could avoid, which is exactly why we deflect those who nag a lot.

You always see the glass as half-empty

While some always see the glass as half full, others see the glass as half empty all the time.

But if you’re concentrated on all the bad things happening, or what can potentially go wrong, then you’re more liable to see those bad circumstances. That’s not even considering that it’s probably going to become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

I’m not saying that you should disregard all the negative events happening in the world, nor that things can go awful.

But what I’m saying is that you should try your best to remain cheerful, and to look at the bright side of life. There’s always something going according to plan as well, so it makes more sense to concentrate on those things since they bring us joy and purpose.

You’re typically in a negative mood

Our emotions are subject to change. But if you’re always in a negative mood, then that’s a clear giveaway that something is not right with your current mental state.

While the world isn’t always rainbows and sunshine, it isn’t always bad or unfavorable either. Thus, you shouldn’t be stuck in a constant state of anger, sadness, or negativity. But if you are, then that might be a sign that you’re disgruntled, or suffering from a mental health condition such as depression.

You have a negative outlook on life

You may have become so bitter and cynical that you’re stuck with an antagonistic outlook on life, even though positive events are happening all around us as well.

There are indeed terrible cases occurring all the time. And in the end, we will all perish. But that doesn’t mean that we can’t enjoy ourselves in the time in between. But we need to look at the bright side of life and stop concentrating on the poor parts too much if we wish to become content.

You claim that you’re simply being realistic

You may simply be more realistic than those around you and see more of the things going wrong than others. But it’s also a possibility that you’re simply saying that to rationalize your negative state of mind and constant moaning.

Rationalizations with some truth to them are incredibly powerful because that means that there’s always an excuse to be made in an attempt to validate our beliefs and actions. Yet, they can be incredibly detrimental because making excuses doesn’t lead to fixing the issues.

You’re irritable after venting

Being irritable after venting isn’t desirable nor the norm since it’s usually done to release frustration and decrease tension as a result.

If you notice that you do tend to get riled up after voicing your concerns, then that might be a sign that you’re simply whining without using that time to improve your attitude. And that simply isn’t helpful at all.

You spend a lot of time with other complainers

As they say, birds of the same feather flock together. If you notice that you’re surrounded by individuals who’re constantly making a fuss about the smallest of things, then you might just be complaining too much.

If that’s the case, then I would suggest searching out better company while changing your course of action. That’s because we don’t enjoy being around those who are constantly whining, and who are never in a good mood.

You surround yourself with negative people

Surrounding yourself with negative people means you’re more likely to be around snivellers as well.

Focusing on unfavorable circumstances makes you more likely to seek out like-minded individuals since you’re probably going to see all the dreadful things that are happening, while possibly becoming bitter and cynical in the process.

You’re too hard on yourself

Being too hard on yourself can cause frustration and anger. But it can also create perfectionism that makes you disgruntled about all minor things that don’t go your way, or according to your plan.

While trying your best, and taking accountability for your actions is great, being overly hard on yourself will create more issues than it solves. You should also practice self-love while being kind to yourself to balance out the seriousness and tension.

Everything has to be perfect, it’s never good enough

Perfectionism can make you great at something since obsessed people put in the required time and effort. Still, it’s a vicious cycle since we’re inherently imperfect, and can never attain true perfection of our craft and abilities.

That’s why trying to be overly precise typically leads to frustration and anger eventually because things are never impeccable or going according to our plans.

Striving for greatness is perfectly fine and even admirable, but you should realize that it’s never going to be exactly the way you want it to be.

You feel hopeless and helpless

Feeling hopeless and helpless can be the result of many conditions such as learned helplessness, or a mental illness like depression. Yet, it can also be a clue that you’re stuck in a rut while being unable to see a way out anymore.

If that’s the case, then you should try directing your attention to the circumstances that are under your voluntary control, and that you can change instead of trying to whine about all the stuff that we can’t do anything about.

Try utilizing your energy positively instead of wasting it aimlessly.

You tend to dwell on what happened in the past

The past acts as the stern teacher that confirms we might have made some mistakes, but ultimately grew past these errors as individuals because we learned of those blunders and failures.

However, some people get stuck in the past and keep reliving the disappointments and faults they once made.

That’s only useful until we’ve learned the lesson(s) that we need to learn from those painful experiences. But afterward, we need to let bygones be bygones and look forward to the future since we’re now better equipped to deal with new, challenging situations.

You think in problems instead of solutions

A lot of folks think of problems instead of solutions. But I think that’s simply counterproductive. What good is it to create more issues rather than solve them to improve our existence by making our lives easier and less stressful?

You should make it a point to focus on what you can do to make things better instead of creating more concerns by enlarging the difficulties that already exist. 

You compare too much

There’s only one person you should compare yourself to, and that’s yourself. Everyone’s different, and thus, so are our skills, perks, and imperfections.

Everyone has their gifts, but also weaknesses, which means we should play to our strengths. But unfortunately, most of us try to compare the things we’re not as competent or talented at with others who are superb at those things. This regularly creates low self-esteem and a sense of inferiority.

You don’t handle compliments well

Not handling compliments well can be a sign of low self-regard, but also that you’re thinking that everyone’s out to get you and that all compliments are a ruse by default.

Both aren’t beneficial to our existence and should be fixed if we wish to live a meaningful and content life. Learning to appreciate praise is beneficial to your mood and overall well-being since we all like to be acknowledged from time to time.

You think everyone’s out to get you

I believe it’s true that some folks are terrible, and out to get us by attempting to misuse our trust and empathy. But it’s foolish to believe that everyone out there is that malevolent.

You shouldn’t be naive, but you also shouldn’t think the worst of all those around you. You should learn to trust, but more importantly, who to rely on. That’s something that we can exclusively learn through observation, and through practical experience by living our life to the fullest.