Why you have to be obsessed or be average


Kevin Mangelschots

We all have a choice in life. And those choices have consequences for the present, and future you.

Being preoccupied with something means you can excel at that given thing. The disadvantage is that you will have to deviate from the norm, which can be hard at times. But we know that different thoughts and ideas lead to growth.

Here’s why you either have to be obsessed, or be average.

Why do you have to be obsessed or be average in life?

Image of the quote, “don't settle for average, be awesome” written in black letters on a yellow background.

People often want and sometimes even expect to accomplish extraordinary things while simultaneously being average. They want as much free time as the average person, to put in just the time that the average individual puts in, all the while reaping the rewards highly skilled people get.

Not to mention that people who go on to achieve great things typically have great talents such as a high IQ, a talent to concentrate, and to work long hours relentlessly.

Yet, there’s a reason, or multiple ones, why the average Joe doesn’t accomplish extraordinary feats. One of the main reasons is that if you want to achieve great things, then this means that you have to deviate from the norm and the average as well. Whether you want to or not.

Sure, you can have the same interests as the average bloke, but other qualities will surely need to be above average if you want to accomplish those big dreams. Except if you get lucky and win the lottery by chance, that is.

Average people accomplish average things, while obsessed people accomplish extraordinary things. You’ve got to be obsessed with your craft, or you’re destined for an average life.

Now are great accomplishments and material wealth such a great thing? Is it all fun and games? Most certainly not. As I said before, there goes a great amount of time, effort, and ability towards achieving all these boons. And it is certainly no shame to live an average life if that is what you desire.

Image of a fence standing in the middle of a field of grass.

The grass always seems greener on the other side. While a lot of famous or rich people might be jealous of the unanimity and the free time of the average person, most “average” people will probably be jealous of the amount of fame, attention, and money that extraordinary people make.

Still, I think that almost everyone has their talents and strengths. And perhaps it is best to learn and master that specific trait or craft you’re good at. Just because you are ordinary at most things or wish to lead a mostly average life doesn’t mean you can’t be exceptional in other areas of your existence.

But you don’t get to be exceptional for free. There’s a cost to everything, a price to pay. I would say that some people are more suited to live a special life, while others are probably better off and happier living a normal, standard, average life.

My point is that you should not let other people dictate how you should live. That’s entirely up to you. And it’s also your responsibility to figure out what makes you happy, and what doesn’t. And if you are currently unhappy or have figured out what you want to do and become, then the ball is in your court to go after it and to make sure that you achieve it.

It’s up to you to pick your poison. Which means that whatever you choose, you’re going to suffer regardless. But you at least get to decide what you get to suffer for. And it’s much better to suffer for something that you care about, for something that you truly want to attain. Needless suffering is pointless.

Obsession might make you exceptional at one given thing, but it also means that the tunnel vision that allows you to achieve your dream blurs out the rest of your broader spectrum of view. It allows you to specialize, but you also don’t see the other beautiful things there are to life.

So again, it has its upsides, but certainly also its negatives. You will have to decide for yourself if you want to be obsessed or average.

Frequently asked questions (FAQ)

How to be average in life?

A person holding a question mark in front of their face.

You can be average if you do exactly what the ordinary person does. Because the norm is considered normal. If you copy the rest, and do exactly what other people do without sticking out.

Now, most of us have our talents, the potential to be exceptional. But being exceptional by default means not being average. All of us also have their weaker or neutral skills, which will be average.

This means that most of us are by definition not totally average. Although a lot of people have untapped potential which makes them seem average to the bare eye.

Yet, this is not the same as being the same as everybody else. There’s hidden, latent talent to be tapped into. And there’s no greater shame than wasted potential.

How to not be average?

Illustration of a yellow colored stick man stepping out of the group.

There’s a simple solution to learn how to not be average. Find your talent(s) which will be your strengths. Explore them, and develop your hidden potential in order to become a great and accomplished person.

Most people don’t dare to be great. They are afraid of hard work, of their talents. Or perhaps they listen to the mediocre people who are telling them they will never accomplish anything of worth.

Therefore, we are stuck with an enormous amount of people who are talented, but got very little to show for it. This is of course an absolute tragedy.

It’s the same with smart people. Just because they don’t seem that smart at first glance or because other people don’t identify them as smart doesn’t mean they aren’t incredibly intelligent. Sometimes geniuses are ridiculed and regarded as dumb until they succeed and become successful. Then the masses suddenly proclaims them intelligent and even as geniuses.

Final note

Image of the word, “conclusions” written on a black backboard with white chalk.

It’s up to you to pick your poison. Being average or obsessed both have their perks and downsides.

Whatever you decide to pick, be sure to choose based on what you want to achieve during your lifetime, not what other people think or want you to do.

My personal opinion is that the most meaning and happiness can be found in doing what you enjoy and what you’re good at. More specifically, in the path towards competence and excellence.

So I urge you to explore your talents. Dare to be great!

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