Why confidence is silent and insecurities are loud


Kevin Mangelschots

We’ve all seen barking dogs who cowered away all frightened and anxious when push came to shove, while the calm dog who didn’t let out a single bark was vicious in the end.

That’s because barking dogs typically don’t bite. And it’s a perfect metaphor for life as well.

This is why confidence is silent, and insecurities are loud.

Why are insecurities loud and confidence silent?

Confident people have nothing to prove

People who are fully secure with themselves simply don’t feel the demand to prove themselves to others. They understand that the only person they should be, and compete with, is themselves.

As a result, they don’t need to get overly loud to try to impress their peers. That’s also why secure people can let go of the need to be right more readily than those who doubt themselves.

Confident people don’t need validation

Confident folks can afford to remain calm since they have little need for external validation.

Sure, it feels good to get some recognition once in a while. But if your whole sense of being depends on it, like it does with severely insecure people, then you know you’ve got an issue that you should resolve.

Confident people don’t need attention

Image of four people sitting in a classroom not paying attention.

Confidence needs to come from within. It’s extremely unhealthy to let your sense of self-worth be determined by the amount of attention and validation you get from others.

Self-assured people understand this and are busy improving themselves while focusing on their rich internal world, all the while chasing their goals and dreams.

Insecure people try to hide their weaknesses

The quote “you spend less energy pretending and more energy performing when your weakness is known” written in white letters on a background.

Insecure people often desperately try to hide their weaknesses. The irony is that no one is perfect and that everyone has their things they’re insecure about.

Yet, overanxious people regularly try to conceal their weak spots by overcompensating. They try to cover their true feelings by being overly brassy to seem powerful, certain, and resourceful.

Insecure people need validation

Since insecure individuals don’t truly know who they are, or what they stand for, they need validation to feel like what they’re doing is the right thing to do.

But everyone is different. With each of their unique strengths, weaknesses, and personalities. That’s why what’s good for you might not be the right path for me to take.

That’s also the reason why you shouldn’t rely too much on the validation of others to confirm that you’re doing well in life.

Insecure people need attention

Doing something that deviates from the norm is bound to garner attention. And being brash is one such way to do so.

This attention makes them feel important, and like they’re someone of value. But other people can’t give you true confidence, no matter how much external validation you get.

It’s fragile, and can easily be shattered when someone gives a critique or doesn’t agree with you. Full-fledged confidence stems from deep within our core since we feel like what we’re doing is right. This type of self-assuredness is unshakable, not to mention that it will last for a lifetime.

Insecure people try to overcompensate

At their center, insecure people are obnoxiously loud since they’re trying to overcompensate for their insecurities. In other words, they’re being so vocal since they feel weak and small inside.

They frequently keep doing so because they might get away with it for a while since other people mistake this fake bravado for confidence and strength.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)

What does “insecurities are loud, confidence is silent” mean?

A person holding a question mark in front of their face.

Insecurities are loud, and confidence is silent, which means that insecure people are being overly brash to compensate for and hide their insecurity.

They try to hide their weaknesses by portraying themselves as this extremely confident, strong, and capable person.

Confidence is quiet since these people are self-assured and fully aware of their capabilities. They have no need nor desire to prove themselves to other people, or to over-correct by being loud to garner attention or external validation.

Who said confidence is quiet, insecurity is loud?

Marlon Brando starring as Don Corleone or Vito Corleone in the movie “The Godfather.”
Marlon Brando who played Vito Corleone, also commonly called Don Corleone in the popular movie, The Godfather, has famously said “Confidence is silent, insecurities are loud.”

Is confidence loud or silent?

Confidence is silent because secure people have nothing left to prove to others, don’t need external validation, nor do they desperately seek attention to boost their self-esteem.

They know who they are, and are fully assured of what they’re capable of.

Confidence is silent, insecurities are loud synonyms

Possible synonyms for “confidence is silent, insecurities are loud” are:

  1. Insecurities are loud, confidence is silent
  2. Confidence is silent insecurities never shut up
  3. The loudest person in the room is the weakest
  4. Confidence is quiet, insecurities are loud

While the wording might be different, these phrasings mean by and large the same. Thus, they will often be used interchangeably.


Image of the word, “conclusions” written on a black backboard with white chalk.

Insecurities are loud, confidence is silent.

That’s why the loudest person in the room is probably the weakest since they’re trying to overcompensate for their imperfections by being overly vocal in an attempt to be perceived as strong and secure.

Instead of trying to deceive yourself and those around you, try to work on becoming more self-assured by becoming more capable, and conscious of your strengths and weaknesses.

It’ll serve you much better than having to be the loudest people in the room, that’s for sure.